By Wendy Buckingham

It’s in these supposedly threatening economic times that networking can really come into its own as a tool for success.  Being seen and heard and making valuable connections will give you the edge over your less visible competitors. 

Tempting, as it may be to dump networking in your cost cutting efforts, it is not good sense for either staff morale or business.

Kim McGuinness, founder of Network Central and co-author of Network or Perish, believes forward thinking companies in today’s volatile economic climate realise that they must look after their staff and attract new business.

“So when many businesses are pulling back from staff spending, those who realise the value of their people and continue to motivate and support them will be the clear winners.

McGuinness says it is more important than ever to establish your networks and create quality connections.”

“Being a master networker is about building authentic relationships and to do that you must put yourself in places where you are going to meet people with whom you could do business”, she says.

“Regardless of the modern age of email contact, people still choose to do business with those they like and have an affinity with”.

Network Central holds breakfasts and lunches mainly for women leading teams – either in the corporate world of management or within their own businesses.  www.networkcentral.com.au

McGuinness recently conducted a survey and found that many women found it difficult to make new contacts and often ended up only talking to the person next to them.

To correct this she now appoints an experienced networker as a mentor to each table.  The networking mentor’s job is to facilitate inclusive conversations and make sure everybody at the table gets to share what they do and what they may need along with an injection of personality to kick start the relationship.  After all, McGuinness believes the person is of importance and a joy to get to know.  Business comes later through an enjoyable and organic process.

Networking tips from McGuinness include:

• The key to building successful business networks is to be authentic.  Always follow up any promises you make to someone you meet at the networking function.  If you say you are going to send something, or put the person in contact with someone – do it.

• Take the time to arrive at the event calm, organised and focused.  Your energy will carry an enormous amount of weight when meeting people.  Turn your phone off and be fully present.  This goes for any business or social interaction – look people in the eye and really listen to what they have to say.

• Just because a person you meet might not have a direct need for your services don’t disregard them as unimportant contacts. You never know who they know.

• Be memorable but not annoying!   For example, it’s great to follow up people and referrals with a thank you card, but skip those sparkles that spill all over the desk and need cleaning up! Be memorable for the right reasons.

• Utilise social networking tools such as LinkedIn, twitter or facebook to back up the connections made at events.  Ask people how they like to communicate – don’t assume everyone is the same as you.  If they prefer email or a phone call then contact them via these methods. Write this information down in your address book, card file or database and adhere to it when contacting that person.  They will thank you for it.

• Finally, know why you are networking in the first place!  Define your goals and be clear on your reasons for being at a particular event.  Amazingly you attract what you put out so make sure you are putting out the right message.

We are all shocked and saddened by the bushfire tragedy in Victoria. I have just spoken to a family friend in Kinglake, Victoria who has told me that 20 people are still missing and the deathtoll is horrific. Many who survived have lost their homes and the tragedy was witnessed by many children. The key to rebuilding is encouraging people to stay in the area by living in caravans with a generator while they rebuild. This will keep the local businesses going, the schools going and prevent the town from extinction. If you or your company is in a position to donate a caravan or a generator then let me know and I will put you in touch with the people there. If you can donate funds then go to www.redcross.org.au and contribute to their online appeal.   There is aso an interesting article here:  http://planetark.org/wen/51536

What will it take for the world to see that we are destroying our planet? We simply must support carbon friendly companies, fund green initiatives and try to use green power. Every little thing we can do does add up to a benefit for the planet and our lives can be simplified and enriched by considering the impact of our actions. I know I certainly am starting to think twice about leaving the lights on and I now refuse to use my dryer as a result of the bushfires in Victoria and floods in QLD.  Prior tothis tragedy my family implemented “no tech Tuesday” into our home.  After 5pm every Tuesday we do not use lights, appliances or other power (where possible – the fish still need their heater!) and spend the evening talking and playing games by candlelight.  This serves two purposes – it saves power and connects the family – after the kids go to bed my husband and I usually open a bottle and talk until the late evening which has been just wonderful.  No TV to distract and no computers.  Are we making a difference to the planet?  I like to think we are in some small way but we are certainly making a difference in our family and making the kids aware that their actions impact the planet.  That’s got to be worth something.

Check out what we have on offer this month at www.networkcentral.com.au  - Mentoring by the best in our 2009 Mentor Program, a fabulous networking event which is booking quickly and the 30 Day Marketing Challenge by Carolyn Stafford. 50% of all bookings between now and the end of February will go directly to the Bushfire Victims.

was my son’s first day back at school. This morning I hugged and waved goodbye to a vastly different child than he was last year. My little boy coped with a major operation and the surrounding hurdles with grace, maturity and trust that was well beyond his years (he is now 7). This year’s first day back at school I watched him run to his friends and start the new year with happiness and enthusiasm. He truly is a different child.

How many of us have had a shocking 2008 or at least a challenging one. 2009 is predicted to be a difficult one as well so our attitude and relationships are what will carry us through. Maybe we should all behave as if we are starting school again for the year and look at it with fresh, enthusiastic and joyful eyes. It might just save us, our children and our very important relationships.

That is the comment I have heard most this new year!  Where has the time gone and what are we going to do differently to keep it around a bit longer this year?  Valuing and building relationships – both personal and business – benefits our lives, our careers and our families in ways that nothing else can.

The end of 2008 saw Network Central turn 10.  I am so incredibly proud of the members we have and the calibre of this astounding network of people.  You are all truly an inspiration to us and each other.  Thank you for being a part of this journey.

So what is the vision was for the next ten years? To create an environment where we can collectively nurture and empower the hearts and minds of this and future generations to ensure the survival of this planet and its people.  Big vision I know but I believe that we all have a part to play in this.  Most critically we need to empower, inspire and nurture children and emerging leaders, whether we employ, manage, mentor, mother, support or befriend them.  Similarly if we are an emerging leader we can respect, appreciate and capture the amazing knowledge, experience and wisdom of those before us. In the process of giving and receiving we will achieve our own goals and support those that may be less fortunate.

This is a big goal and this is the time of year to create our plan for the year.  To this end, our first speaker is an expert on achieving all you can and presents a truly transformational system.  Grab a group and join us on Wednesday 25th February to start the process for developing and achieving your 2009 goals.  Use the network to find those who can help you and hit the ground running in this coming, and possibly challenging, year. 

Finally, consider membership of Network Central.  Join in member forums and be a part of a myriad of benefits and significant discounts to our events program.

We look forward to seeing you again!

I was asked this question recently and although the answers we may give have always been important, they are now critical.

Do whatever we can to protect our planet. Each small action adds up to a significant contribution if everyone does it. Do an audit of your home, business or workplace, and your life and see what changes you can make to conserve water, energy and waste. The smallest change can add up to significant savings over a year or more. Being environmentally aware isn’t just a nice thing to do anymore – it’s an absolute necessity.
There are many ways to contribute but here are just a few to get you started:

* Change appliances to energy-saving ones or go back to the good old-fashioned way of doing things by hand. Hang clothes on the line instead of using the dryer (your clothes will last longer too).

* Wash clothes in cold water and use an environmentally friendly laundry liquid.

* Network on the go by picking up a colleague or two on the way to work rather than everyone driving their own car.

* Plant some native trees and drought hardy plants, and create an environment for native animals in your garden. If you don’t have a garden, consider giving a gift of a tree to a friend who does.

* Don’t drive to the shops – do yourself and the planet a favour and get some exercise! Try to leave the car at home one day per week.

Perhaps most imprtantly, the other thing we can do to create a better tomorrow is to be nice to each other. There is too much aggression in our society today. I so often see people being rude to the people they come across in their daily dealings and it really isn’t necessary. [[Say thank you with a wave when driving if someone lets you go in front of them]], say hello to the bus driver or shop assistant and ask them how they are. And perhaps most importantly – smile!

It has been a while since my last post.  The reason for this is that my son has been through a major operation or two which threw a major curve ball to me and my family.   Thankfully he is now out of danger but he will require a number of further operations down the track.  The next one in March.  He has only just turned 7 so you can imagine how worrying it is when they are so small and frightened. 

I can’t begin to tell you how much I have learned from this little boy.  He has handled everything with the strength and poise of someone much much older than his years.  He has taught me how to smile in the face of fear and how to trust that everything will be OK.  He was in so much pain but was more concerned about other kids in his ward than himself.  He was concerned that mummy (me) didn’t have a proper bed to sleep in and moved over so I could share his.

How many of us could take a lesson from this little boy in today’s economic and environmental climate?  Maybe if we all started thinking of others and smiling in the face of fear – rather than letting it consume our every thought – then our collective energy may just shift a notch or two.  I know it certainly would towards those we love.

Something to think about….

We hope that you all enjoyed the breakfast yesterday morning and gained some new skills in negotiation from our guest speaker, James Glenn.

James theatrical start really ensured that the message would be remembered.  To help reinforce what he spoke about here is some information from James that may help you…

There are times when the behaviour of other people is unacceptable. Sometimes we pass comment upon their actions, at other times we’re reluctant to do so, letting inappropriate conduct slide or holding our tongue for 3 reasons – (a) we feel uncomfortable; (b) we don’t know what to say; or (c) we tell ourselves the outcome isn’t worth the risk of getting it wrong. 

This is not what skilled negotiators nor leaders do.

What makes them different? How do they manage their own actions, commanding others to deliver high standards of professional behaviour, both inside and outside their own organisations?

When a colleague does something wrong, skilled negotiators experience the same feelings as you or I. They feel disappointed, frustrated or upset, even angry, just like us. But they don’t show it. They know outbursts at work spell disaster, damaging reputations, marking us as emotionally immature and reducing peer respect. Emotional explosions are avoided at all costs.

How does a skilled negotiator respond when others push too far?

Firmly, tell others to behave… like this

They express emotions appropriately, commanding the other person to perform a task or process differently, all the time appearing calm and in control. They’ve learnt to apply some very simple techniques.

Your feelings are internal and that’s the best place to deal with them – for the moment. Do not let negative feelings escape. I work very hard to contain mine being expressed in a professional situation for one reason – it helps me to win. If I sense myself becoming exasperated, frustrated or angry about a situation, here’s what I do. 

I blink. 

Literally. For a split second, I draw focus back into myself and allow my internal voice to say, “This person is a cretin,” or something stronger. Use any expression that helps you vent feelings internally and quickly move on. 

Then I blink again, re-focus on their eyes and breathe out. My breathing is measured, my voice calm, deeper in pitch. I become very, very determined. Nothing stops me stating what he/she is now going to do. I have practised this pre-technique routine until it works every time in dealing with negative emotions in any setting. Any fears of appearing slightly intimidating (not my intention) are offset by the increased attention of other person. Now I’m ready to use a simple 5-step technique: 

Speak From The Head 

Let’s use the example of someone who is habitually late for a meeting. It’s a low level conflict situation, but one that everyone can relate to, and for many readers, one which you can apply immediately. The bold text is the constant principle and the regular italic type relates to this specific example. Say the following: 

        When you are late for our meeting,
        The effect is destabilising upon other members of our team.
        This issue is important.
        What do you think?
        Instead, I would like you to arrive ready to begin our meeting
        at 9 o’clock. 

The first step identifies their behaviour – literally, the person is late in attending the meeting. State facts only – do not go into opinions or add other material. 

The second step describes the impact of their behaviour, linking cause and effect – i.e. as a result of “this” we get “that”. 

The third step confirms you’re serious. 

The fourth step engages the other person and asks for their input, a key step to gaining their commitment to any outcome. It gives them a chance to explain their actions. {Despite being “habitually late”, they may have a genuine reason for being late on this occasion.}

The fifth step allows you to re-direct their behaviour. Remember, you want them to act, not respond further – make your short statement after the discussion.
 
An effective mantra

Speak From The Head is a simple mantra that allows you to control your feelings. Linking cause-and-effect makes it easier for the listener to understand what they’ve done. It’s short, so you can remember it, and they get the message without becoming distracted or defensive.

It allows you to assert yourself with dignity.

This technique offers so many benefits… here are a few to consider:

        *  It feels good to control our emotions and not lose it in the heat of the moment. By the way, if you still hold negative feelings, get out of the environment. Go somewhere private and debrief. Speak out the emotions you feel, breathe deeply, and conclude by telling yourself that you’ve resolved the issue.
 
        *  When emotions rise, you only need remember 14 words (the ones in bold type). That’s efficient. And easy to do.

        *  If you feel uncomfortable with conflict (and many people do), acknowledge your achievement in having the courage to speak up about something, given the nature of the other person and the situation.

        *  Your partner is much more likely to listen to what you’re saying and less likely to defend their actions. This reduction in tension allows them to engage in talking with you. The effect upon the listener can be profound, as participants at our Negotiation Seminars often discover. {We’ll show how to leverage this technique even further and how to respond if your partner becomes evasive or dismissive.}

        *  You build stronger relationships by reinforcing acceptable standards of behaviour. Remember the teachers you most respected in school? They were the ones who consistently demanded excellence of you. The same lesson applies in our working lives, too.

        *  Others notice your actions and evaluate your performance more favourably.

It’s just one of the techniques to positively modify behaviour in our Negotiation Seminars to get what you want. If you practise this technique you’ll soon discover it flows easily.

Professional life often challenges our own conduct. Speak From The Head enables you to manage your own emotional behaviour first, before managing the other person’s behaviour to re-direct more effective outcomes – for you, the other person and the organisation.

For more information check out www.negotiationbeyondconflict.com

The final three points focus on follow up, referral and generosity – three vital areas of networking and friendship building in general.  In this century of SMS, email and communication without a face attached, networking is even more important.  Face t face networing as opposed to social networking will always leave a stamp of a person more than a type message.  The atmosphere and goodwill at the Businesswomen’s Breakfast Series is a testament to the vaue of face to face interaction.  Don’t hide behind a keyboard – people will appreciate ad remember you much more if you step out.  You’ll probably have a better time too!  Here are the final three tips…

• Follow up and deliver what you promise – always.
• Refer your contacts freely and confidently without expectation of anything in return. Also be honest with the person you are referring your contact to if you haven’t worked with them before.  Just introduce them and the rest is up to them.
• Bring people with you – invite new contacts from other sources as a guest to your network’s events. If they enjoy the event they will always remember you and may even invite other colleagues who they will introduce to you.

Networking is essential for personal growth, business contacts and referrals – not to mention sanity in an increasingly busy world. Treat networking as an essential part of your business strategy and not just something you do on the side, if you have time. Choose a couple of networks and, for the greatest benefits, get involved as much as you can. Attend events armed with your success tools and a big smile! Don’t keep score of referrals and keep an open mind about everyone you meet. You never know who they know!  Finally, follow your instincts and if someone doesn’t feel right just move on without needing to discuss your reasons with anyone else. Remember, what goes around comes around.

Good luck and happy networking!

Here’s another ten tips to assist you in your networking strategy.  Ask yourself how it is to network with you?  What do you bring to the experience?

• When at a networking opportunity SMILE!! Look approachable; no one will come near you if you have your head buried in the newspaper or look like you just swallowed the taxi driver for breakfast!

• Don’t be afraid to say hello, chances are the person you meet is just as nervous as you.

• At sit-down events, try to sit with people you haven’t met before. Try to get the whole table involved in a discussion

• Aim to make one or two great contacts at each event, anything more than that is a bonus.  Networking is like making friends – relax and enjoy meeting new people, the business will flow later.  As Stephen Covey says “Seek first to understand and then to be understood”

• Look beyond their business and focus on the person.  Remember that networking is about people not just business – business may follow but the important thing is the amazing person you may be about to uncover.

• Ask for business cards if you really want to stay in contact, don’t wait for an offer and only ask if you intend on staying in touch.

• Listen, listen and then listen some more! Treat everyone you meet with respect and integrity. Focus on that person completely, not on who else is in the room.

• Circulate with respect. Be aware of body language and join conversations politely.

• Get to know the host.

• Know when to back off with integrity. Follow your instinct.  There are many ways to politely excuse yourself without being rude. 

So what is a networking strategy and why do you need one? Why do you need to actively network – surely the people you meet in your daily dealings are enough? For some that may be the case…but have you ever heard about someone coming across a brilliant job or business opportunity through some obscure connection? Have you ever bumped into someone you haven’t had contact with for years, only to find that there is incredible synergy between the two of you at that point in time? It does happen – and networking is a valuable investment in making sure that you are in the right place at the right time to make these connections, rather than just hoping that the people in your every day will be enough.  Use the following 10 tips to assist you in creating your own strategy:  Tomorrow we’ll look at another ten.

• Be clear on your reasons for networking and determine what your goals are, then write them down. Re-visit these goals before you attend each networking event

• Don’t go to events with the sole intention of making a sale or getting your business card into as many people’s hands as possible.   Everyone is, or knows, a potential client or valuable contact.

·         Clarify what business you are in and come up with a short, simple way of explaining this.  Try to phrase your short statement in terms of what benefit you deliver – rather than just what you do

• Maintain a good diary system (for scheduling time to attend events), remembering to schedule the time required to travel to and from the event as well as for follow-up phone calls, coffee meetings and so on. After each event diarise follow-up calls, reminders and advance notes about who to catch up with at the next event.

• Create systems for tracking contacts from each network and event (to keep in touch and help build relationships).

• Read the newspapers and a few business magazines to develop a bank of conversation topics, but steer clear of religion, politics and other potentially controversial subjects. You could even create an “oh really?” file with interesting stories about business, science and general interest. Look for articles that people will enjoy hearing or be fascinated by and want to tell others. The occasional (clean) joke never goes astray either!

• Choose networks that fit with your interests and area of business and some others that cover a broader reach.   You don’t always want to do business with those in your industry.

• If you have limited time it is preferable to attend one or two networks regularly, rather than try to spread yourself over a number of networks irregularly.

• Maximise your involvement within each network – Offer to become involved in the network through volunteering for committees, submitting articles for newsletters and websites, assisting on the registration desk or offering door prizes at events.

• Arrive at events early and take the time to meet other ‘early birds’.  Be happy to be there.